Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe (The Recipe for Terrible Cookies)

Hey there, fellow bakers and cookie enthusiasts! Today, we will embark on a culinary adventure that takes us down a path most sweet tooth dread: the Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe.

Before you close this tab or start doubting your decision to read further, let me assure you that sometimes the best lessons come from our failures.

We’ve all had our fair share of baking mishaps, and it’s important to embrace them with a sense of humor and an open mind. So, let’s put on our aprons, tie up our hair, and dive headfirst into the world of chocolate chip cookie disasters.

Trust me, by the end of this post, you’ll not only appreciate the art of cookie-making even more, but you’ll also gain a few tips on how to avoid those dreaded baking blunders. Are you ready? Let’s roll up our sleeves and get started!

Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe
Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe
  • Prep Time: 10 minutes
  • Inactive Time: 0 minutes (since this recipe does not require any chilling or resting time)
  • Cook Time: 12-15 minutes
  • Total Time: 22-25 minutes
  • Yield: Approximately 12 disappointing cookies (yield may vary based on the size of the cookie dough mounds)

Ingredients:

  • 1 cup all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted and cooled
  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 1/4 cup packed brown sugar
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 1 large egg
  • 1/2 cup chocolate chips (optional, for a touch of disappointment)

Instructions:

  1. Preheat your oven to 350°F (175°C). Line a baking sheet with parchment paper, or use a non-stick baking mat for an extra challenge in removing the cookies later.
  2. Combine all-purpose flour, baking soda, and salt in a medium-sized bowl. Set this mixture aside for now, as it will be the foundation of our flavorless cookies.
  3. Add the melted and cooled unsalted butter, granulated sugar, and packed brown sugar in a separate bowl. Mix them until they’re well-incorporated, without hinting of creaminess or smoothness.
  4. Add the vanilla extract to the butter and sugar mixture. It won’t magically enhance the flavor, but it’s an essential part of our recipe.
  5. Gently crack the large egg into the bowl and stir it into the mixture. Be careful not to overmix, as we want to avoid any signs of fluffiness or texture.
  6. Gradually incorporate the dry mixture into the wet mixture, stirring until everything is combined. Remember, we’re not looking for a cohesive dough but a crumbly, unappetizing mixture.
  7. If you dare to add a layer of disappointment, sprinkle in the chocolate chips and barely fold them into the dough. Remember, we’re aiming for minimal enjoyment here.
  8. Pair the dough into small, uneven mounds on the prepared baking sheet using a spoon or your hands (for a truly hands-on experience). Leave plenty of space between them to ensure they spread out unevenly.
  9. Place the baking sheet in the oven and bake for about 12-15 minutes or until the cookies are a pale, unappealing shade of golden brown.
  10. Remove the sheet from the oven and let the cookies cool on a wire rack. Don’t be alarmed if they crumble upon touch or lack any semblance of chewiness. That’s all part of the Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe experience.

Serving size: 1 cookie

NUTRIRIONAMOUNT
Calories(kcal)65
Fat4.4g
Cholesterol0mg
Sodium40mg
Potassium76mg
Carbs6.7g
Fiber0.0g
Sugar2.9g (may be higher depending on your ingredients)
Protein0.2g
Vitamin A0.0mg
Vitamin C0.0mg
Iron0.1mg
Worst Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

1. Start with the right ingredients: Mixing the dough too much can make it tough, so don’t overmix. Use a stand mixer to speed up this process if you have one.

2. Bake for about 10 minutes less than stated in the recipe, rather than the amount listed. Your oven may vary; if you overbake your cookies, they will be tough and dry.

3. Keep the cookies within an inch of the oven walls, as the burned chocolate will fall off.

4. Chocolate chips are a hot commodity, so it’s best to use them immediately rather than let them melt in the refrigerator.

5. Be sure to verify that there is enough holiday spirit in your cooking utensils before starting this recipe. Otherwise, you may find yourself with all ingredients but no cookies and no idea how you got there.

These cookies are the WORST!

Conclusion

Even though it is not the best chocolate chip cookie recipe you can find on the internet, the worst one is still pretty good.

If you have developed a taste for oatmeal cookies and takeout Chinese food, this is more than likely what will end up in your belly.

About the Author: Ginger Wickelhaus, author of Secret Recipe Club, has been working in marketing as a communications specialist for 20 years. She has also worked as a digital creative strategist and web developer at Chicago ad agencies and New York design shops.